Christmas Decorating Embarrassment!

28 Nov

Dudes! Help!

My human just got back from running errands, and so Ally and I ran into the hall. Once out there.. we were stunned. Frozen in our tracks.  We saw this:

Dudes! That is NOT our door!

THIS is our door:

That’s it! That’s it!

Does the human not understand? Does she not get that this is not the type of decorating that a cat of my stature requires! Bright lights! Constant Jingle Cats playing.  Hey maybe an announcement when ever anyone comes near our door that says “Merry Christmas. You are now nearing the door of that Awesome Orange Cat Malcolm. Peace to you!” But no!

Then she thinks she is making up for that sad sack door decoration by hanging this on the inside:

O.M.G! O.M.G!

What is happening here? Really? This is decorating? I am so so so so so so so embarrassed to be living here.

Oh and look at our tree:

Notice anything missing? She actually told another human in an email last night that she might just leave it undecorated this year, because it has lights and the lights are her favorite part.  I am sorry! I can not live like this! I need ornaments to pull off the tree! I need a tree skirt to lay on under the tree!

THIS IS A TRAVESTY!  I can not continue to live here in these conditions!  I need ornaments on the tree and I need them now!

Friends, here is a picture from the good ol’ days, when a human decorated, as a human should. Ah.. how I long for last year.

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2 Responses to “Christmas Decorating Embarrassment!”

  1. Kay Buck November 30, 2010 at 10:01 pm #

    Malcolm,

    I don’t understand what happened. I cannot believe she would neglect you like that. I have heard you can report humans with unholidaylike behavior to the HWHS. (humans without holiday spirit ) I would not report her right away. I would wait a week and see if it changes. I am sure when her work load lightens she will do you proud. signed Lester’s Mom

    • Susan November 30, 2010 at 10:13 pm #

      Oh, thank you Lester’s mom! You are a human of great wisdom and intelligence. I will wait a week. Or maybe you could bring Floyd and Lester over
      next week when you are in town and we can all decorate! Let’s do it!

      Yr greatest friend ever,
      Orange Malcolm

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